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It seems like there are a million different articles, posts, podcasts, books, and more about caring for children… what to do, what not to do, what to remember, what to avoid, etc… the list goes on and on. It can become overwhelming for parents and caregivers. Even I have several posts like that… a post about toddlers and manners, a post about what to say instead of “good job,” a post about what to say instead of “you’re beautiful,” a post about screen time, a post about too many activities… again, the list goes on. I’m always trying to gain knowledge of what is more beneficial to do and say… to add to a mental toolkit of things to practice doing or saying… and I love writing about what I’ve learned and sharing my perspectives. All of us are wanting to be better for our kids and to give them the best of us. We are all trying, but honestly at the end of the day, sometimes all the info, all the things we want to remember, all the things we want to practice doing more or less of… it’s a lot.
I made a note to myself that the most important thing as a momma is to just lead with love and connection. We are all working hard to be the best we can be for our kids, and because of that, I’m sure we are doing just fine. As long as we fill our days with gentleness, kindness, playfulness, compassion, laughter, understanding, connection, and so much love… that’s the most important thing about parenting and taking care of kids.
It won’t break your connection if you get a little frustrated and impatient. Apologize, kids see you self-regulate and show kindness… that’s love. It won’t hurt them if you need a break and let them watch a bit more tv than usual. It will help you be a better and more patient mom with some self-care… that’s love. Kiddos don’t mind if you are sitting watching them play while you fold laundry instead of playing with them. You’re still making an effort to be present… that’s love. It will be okay if you spend the day skipping through the parking lot while running errands instead of going to the waterpark or the zoo. You are still having fun together… that’s love. You’re not failing if you send your kids to school with a $2 Lunchable instead of veggie-filled vegan bento boxes because you decided to have a dance party at breakfast. (Let’s be real, Lunchables were awesome when we were kids.) You made memories that morning and it’s still food… that’s love.
No matter what, an “imperfect” day filled with love and connection is a good day.
So just love those sweet kiddos. Be present. Fill everyday moments with joy. Be playful and goofy. Care for them with gentle voices and gentle hands. Slow down and listen. Sit with them. Talk and tell stories. Apologize when needed. Give too many hugs and snuggles. Laugh together. Have fun. Begin and end each day with a smile and a grateful heart. It’s the love that eludes from you and fills your days and the connection they feel when they’re with you that they will hold dear in their hearts as the years go by. Above all else, just lead with love and connection. That’s the one thing to remember.
Lots of love from this momma, and thanks for reading.
Anna
